Insights & Guidance for Planning Ahead

The year 2024 was a banner tomato year in the Clinkscales household, all thanks to my wife, Barbara. It was not the quantity; it was the quality. Barb started her Heirloom tomatoes in March 2024, planting seeds in starter containers. She sat them on a buffet in the South part of our living room, so they would get abundant light. When the seeds sprouted, she treated the sprouts like new babies – lots of care, watering, and nurturing (and, yes, kind words were spoken). Wh

If you listen to the talking heads, the Kansas City Chiefs have the referees in their pocket. All penalties go the way of the Chiefs; the Chiefs quarterback gets all the favorable calls. It is interesting, because statistically none of that is true. In fact, one Chiefs’ player is the 2nd most penalized player in the NFL (Taylor). Mahomes is the 21st player benefiting from a roughing the passer penalties. The other day I had a meeting with a family. One member of the family ha

We celebrate Valentine’s Day on February 14th. I always had a special Valentine: my mom. Mom was born on Valentine’s Day, and was named after it, Vallee. My parents were young—just 20 when they had me as their first born. While growing up, I always had the youngest parents compared to my friends. My mom was beautiful and gregarious. At times she was compared to the famous actress, Elizabeth Taylor. Later in life I learned that most of the other boys in my high school class h

Just a few months ago, we adopted a one year old labrador mix, Milo. This was after we had lost all three of our dogs, Indy, Kiah and Kobe over the space of about six months. The three all had connections to two other labs, Star and Maggie, that had passed away a few years earlier. They were all best of friends. Adoption was not an easy or quick decision. We were adopting a stranger. Sometimes when I look into Milo’s eyes, I feel like I can see Star. When Star looked at

Last week my wife, Barb, and I adopted Milo, an 85 pound one year old labrador mixed dog. We got him from the Hays Humane Society. It was a big step for us. We lost Indy in December 2023; then Kiah in January 2024; and finally our last love, Kobe, in May 2024. The three of them were best friends for many years. We were devastated, and I felt like my heart had been emptied. When trying to decide whether to adopt, we were asking ourselves: Do we jump back into dog owner

We receive many of the same questions from our clients, readers of our daily emails, other attorneys, nursing homes, and care facilities. “What is a DNR? And, Can you help me create a DNR?” A DNR is a “Do Not Resuscitate” directive or order. It is a patient’s directive that can become a doctor’s order. It is not for everyone, but everyone has the right to make a DNR directive. A DNR describes what medical care a person does not want to receive if that person stops breathing o

I arrived at about 2:50pm for my first 3:00pm middle school football game. My youngest daughter, Rachel, started cheerleading this year. I discovered I was too late! In Hays, Kansas, the stands are packed 10 minutes before a middle school football game. There were about three seats left or standing room only. You could not see the game from any of the remaining seats – and my wife and mother were scheduled to join me in 30 minutes. I never expected middle school football woul

My first column that I ever wrote was for a periodic called the “Kansas Senior Times.” I was asked to write articles of interest to older adults. After some deliberation, I decided to call it “Gray Matters.” My thought was that though we are older, we still matter. And there are topics that matter to us. And the gray matter, “our brain,” has so much stored in it by way of knowledge and wisdom, that it needs and should be shared. Now, to the 2024 election. A few years ago,

A family in crisis came to see me recently. There were multiple children. Mom was there. She is in her eighties and recently had a series of crises, resulting in a couple of hospitalizations. The family reported signs of dementia, but in our meeting, mom was articulate and engaged. A couple of the children live in the area and are trying to help mom. One child from out of state has come home to get mom through this crisis but needs to go back to her own home out of state. Som

Many of you know that we talk about working with our client/families and being “A Guide for Your Journey”. For some that may be a...